Alexa & Tito…

They are back!!!

I have two new best friends.  There names are Alexa and Tito.
(If you get it …you get it.)

So….this morning:

MOM:  Dad will most likely be home Thursday.

ME:  Yaay…we have a lot to do to get ready.

MOM:  Yup…I need to practice.

ME:  Practice??  Practice what?

MOM:  His legs are weak….so I am gonna give him lap dances.

ME:  (crickets)

We have ramps that must be built, appointments to schedule and she is stretching like she is preparing for the final Track and Field Olympics

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLP!!!!  and I repeat HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLP!!!!

Go to bed and get up and get ready…oh my!!!

The thoughts that are currently racing through my head…

What did we do when we were younger that made things easier??

For example…why do I have to get up at 5:30 am, just to have enough time to get ready for work?  And, why do I have to go to bed at 10:30 pm,  just to be able to get up at 5:30 am?

And, why do I have to START getting ready at 8:30 pm, in order to go to bed at 10:30 pm?  Why does it take me 2 hours just to GET READY for bed?

WHY??

Between getting ready for bed and getting ready for the day, I’m exhausted!!!


Pretzels, Bunnies and Chocolate…OH MY!!!

So, this morning, I am talking to my Mom. There is a bag of chocolate covered pretzels in the bed. And then…..


ME:  Mom, why do you have chocolate covered pretzels in the bed?

MOM:  Oh..those aren’t mine.

ME:  Ummmmm

MOM:  Gloria gave them to me…I’m not eating them.

ME:  Well…why is the top of the bag ripped open and half of them are gone?

MOM:  She gave them to me like that.

ME:  (Smirk)

MOM:  …and I have a chocolate covered bunny that stays under the bed. He likes chocolate covered pretzels.

ME:  (side eye)

MOM:  I let him come out sometimes…just to chat.

ME:  Are you still sleep?

MOM:  No…

ME:  I got a message from Aunt Phyllis…I need to catch up with her today.

MOM:  My sister is crazy as sh*t. I am beginning to wonder which of my sisters is the nuttiest!

ME:   Mom….you JUST said that you have a chocolate covered bunny who likes chocolate covered pretzels that lives under your bed. And…oh yeah.. that you occasionally chat with!    I think YOU ARE!!
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#BUILTFORDTOUGH
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