Mrs. Ford…you have a very special invitation

Like I always say…I can’t make this up….
(this is kind of long, but so worth it)

My Mother is mad, I mean HOT….sucking teeth mad. You know why????

So…we are at the dining room table and my Dad is sorting the mail. He giggles to himself and put a piece of mail on my Mom’s pile….(and here we goooo)

Dad:  Toni, here is your mail.

Mom: Thanks Babe. (puts it aside, doesn’t look at the letters)

Dad:  Toni…you probably should read your mail…you have something pretty important in there.

Mom:  (picks up her mail…shuffles through the letters quickly)…What are you talking about Mel?

Dad: That postcard….it’s for you.

Mom:  (Shuffles to the post card…starts to read….serious face) Did you get one?

Dad:  Nope

Mom:  Humph…what is this S#$T (remember, Mommy has a potty mouth)

Me:  Well….what is it???

Mom:  (flips the card over to me)

Me:  LOL (It’s an invitation to visit the Cedar Hill Cemetery for an introductory tour and overview)

Mom:  Why they send this S#*t to me???  Mel, you sure you didn’t get one???

Dad:  (giggling)  I am proof positive….I didn’t get one. (chuckle chuckle)

Mom:  I walk every morning….sh#@!   I don’t need no tour!!   Do they know something I don’t know?   They didn’t send one to you Mel?  That ain’t right!!!

Me:  Mom…give me that card. Why are you mad??

Mom: That’s not fair!!!


Mom:  (snatches the card…picks up the phone)

Dials numbers…hand on hip….ring ring

Mom:  Hi, this is Antoinette Ford. I received a card from you inviting me to a tour.

other person:  blah blah blah

Mom:  Mrs. Antoinette Ford.

other person:  blah blah blah

Mom:  Yes, Mrs. Antoinette Ford. Washington, DC.  Yes.  Yes.  That is me.

other person:  blah blah blah

Mom:  Did you send one to my husband, Mr. Melvin Ford?

other person:  blah blah blah

Mom:  Hmm…why not?  He is 4 years older than me!!!

other person:   blah blah blah

Mom:   LOOK!!! Take my name off of your list!!!!!   I’m gonna be here for a while!!!   Have a nice day


She is mad.  Not because she received the card.  She is mad, because she got one BEFORE my Dad….smh smh smh

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