Thursday the 9th

Whew….my Mom got me with this, this morning. Whew…tears. Tears. TEARS.

On this Thursday the 9th (June 9, 2022), I am reflecting on that Thursday the 9th (September 9, 2021).

I miss my Dad terribly, but I am doing pretty good; at times GREAT!

Sometimes I feel bad about feeling good/great. THEN, I hear my Dad’s voice, clearly saying, “Regan…what? Go for it…GO!! I’m good. Have fun. Date. Love. Laugh. LIVE.”.

I feel him daily. I have probably shed a tear every day since he passed. Some from paralyzing sadness and grief but a lot from the wonderful memories and exploits we have had as a family. He is still communicating with us both. I know it…for sure.

I felt my Built Ford Tough voice was lost for a while, but it is back. We are STILL tough. Our leader is now orchestrating from the heavens. Summer Camp is proving to be a HIT.

Driving my Mom up to the Vineyard was so therapeutic. We have being doing that drive since the 70’s. My Dad would strategically pack our car with everything that we would need for our annual summer jaunt and meticulously carve out space for me to sleep. We would leave late at night so that we would arrive at Woods Hole in time to get on the first ferry.

My cousin Ayana and I packed up two cars and carved out space for my Mom, Aunt and Arrow. We each drove while communicating via cell phone. I was my Dad. It felt great.

I have to admit, I was in awe thinking that he did this drive without an EZ Pass; having to slow down to throw some money into a toll well. With NO GPS telling him “speed trap ahead” or WAZE rerouting due to an accident miles ahead. Just a radar detector and sometimes a CB radio.

Thank you family for “listening”…stay tuned!

We are STILL Built Ford Tough!!

Caregiving is hard!

It has been a while since I have posted.

While COVID-19 definitely jacked things up…it also put some things in place.

My caregiving journey is full steam ahead…and IT IS HARD!!!

Built Ford Tough is tougher than ever. My folks are funny and I am super blessed to have them. But, I must learn to say NO. Allow myself rest. Make sure that I remain whole.

As an only-child caregiver, there are areas that are very lonely. Sharing memories. Making decisions…am I doing this right? One thing that this period has taught me…it is ok to say “I don’t know” and “I am scared as shit”

I went back and re-read all of my previous posts. Woooooweeeeee…we are something else. And that will not change.

Thanks for following me on this journey…please continue to ride with me.

Regan