I have struggled with how to properly tell you about this conversation that I had with my Dad. Mainly because he TOTALLY went over my head, but was SO excited, all I could do was smile and nod.
So…my Dad enjoys casinos. He likes to play cards. He shoots craps (is it crap or craps?). I wouldn’t say he is a big gambler, I think he likes the energy of the action. I know in a previous post I told you about the time when we were on the Tom Joyner Fantastic Voyage cruise and at about 4AM, I strolled through the casino and my Dad and Juvenile (yes, the rapper..Juvey) were shooting crap(s) together and chopping it up. Anyway, we took my Dad to the new MGM National Harbor casino the other day. Wooooweee!!! NICE! My Dad wasn’t too excited because the tables have high minimum bet amounts, but he wanted to check it out. Usually, I take him to Dover, Delaware or Maryland Live. He likes Dover, isn’t thrilled with Maryland Live and is not interested in the new spot in Baltimore. So, MGM here we come. Fifteen minutes from the crib. GOLDEN!!!
While my Dad was at the crap(s) table, my Mom and I went to dinner, checked out the casino, the theater and did some people watching. The Voltaggio Brothers have a steak house there. I LOVE the Voltaggio brothers. Hmm Hmm Hmm. Anywhoo…he gambled for a few hours and we headed back home. When we left, my Dad said it was OK, but he couldn’t bet the way he wanted, because of the minimum amounts, etc. He liked MGM but said he would rather continue to go to Dover. OK, Daddy…no problem
This is where this post goes RAIN MAN.
The next morning, Dad called me and Mom into the dining room and proceeded to tell us that he WANTS to go back to MGM and make that his spot. He continued telling us that he stayed up and calculated the distance in miles from the house to each of the casinos, the average amount of gas, amount of time on the road, amount of time gambling and factored in the minimum bet amounts with the amount of cash necessary to gamble the way he likes. He announced that MGM is it, he will just have to change his betting calculations and strategy. But most importantly, HE WON!!! BOOM!
The rest of the conversation went just like this:
Daddy: See….it’s all about probability and mathematics.
Me: looking directly at my dad, smiling and thinking to myself – I wonder if Bed, Bath & Beyond has any new comforters?
Daddy: See….when I am at the table….boomdicddlyboocat. Sctaeddimreladshdl. Yeahdf;pdrhd….ooooscatdodobyoduf. TDboetrkloslikg! You see, when I throw a /#^gRT#F^ADF#&s, I know that..$Bbbodm dddiddddidldy ddeee ddifdley dee.. %d54TGR^#$frg$T536t. Tevgr365234-sdtyjned50d. Scat cat diddly dat boom didddly pdiddy doo!
Me: I want a really exotic colorful comforter and comforter cover.
Daddy: When you bet the 4 & 8 or the 6 & 9, datscat…dr4 olvn7779311 dfnda[fvm ae. Sumeffgnfgld. bwahD.re digjja’ d! 3%ERgGDte0jq543[-jn g44etmqwt4!!
Me: hmmmm…maybe all white. Yeah…all white will be hot!!
Daddy: My calculations determine that dacte ra dfjaw b feurndrundmc fentroa . ddillly laserfafdnf l.e. R%#$^^yU, UferefdteEreF$$$$%gadtrj. bodmr ervbidddly bee bompg boopbnamdj fipbip. E$ a=[q-02i5j-hrwe9jgn3v-tokq32-[vjtkmr.
Me: Oh yeah, I have a BUNCH of those Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons that I can use. Yeah, I need to find my purse
Daddy: So, baby I think I want to go back next week.
Me: OK Daddy, that works for me. No problem
Mom: Mel, you ready to eat.
Daddy: Yeah, I’m hungry.
ROFL….check out the emoji’s below and the comment section.